


Oh No, He's Cute

by reluctantOracle



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-06-27 22:36:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15694734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reluctantOracle/pseuds/reluctantOracle
Summary: Dave is grateful that Dirk has finally realised what kind of life he'd left his little brother in with Bro. He's grateful he decided to take him out of it all. He's especially grateful to Dirk's friend, who is letting them stay while they figure out what to do next.He is less grateful that Dirk's friend is a tall, handsome, utterly ridiculous man named Jake English. Nope. He's not grateful for that at all.A roommates AU for DaveJake because what is more Strider than getting a crush on your older brother's best friend, especially when your older brother probably also has a crush on his best friend and now you're all living together.





	1. Escape

**Author's Note:**

> this one goes out to @bakuseros on twitter bc u are so damn valid with ur fuckin rarepairs also shoutout to homestuck for still being one of my interests
> 
> this first chapter is real short because i havent written fanfic in forever and wanna ease myself back into the swing of it love u all xoxo

“Are you awake?”

Dirk spoke softly, eyes trained on the road ahead. His voice was calm, but his hands gripped the steering wheel with unusual intensity as the city faded into the horizon. Dave was curled up in the seat next to him. “Yeah.” He answered. He was staring at the raindrops streaming past on the window, almost horizontal. “You good?” Dirk asked him. Dave’s gaze flickered sideways to his brother, and caught the tense, worried expression. “Yeah.” He said. 

“Listen, man. If I had known about him, I would never have…” he trailed off, fixing his attention to the road once again. Dave shook his head in a short, jerky movement. “But you didn’t know. No one did.” 

Dirk hadn’t known because he hadn’t lived with them for very long. He had been scouted by some major engineering school when he was around thirteen and Dave had been ten, and had spent most of Dave’s life away building computers and programs. He was sure Bro hadn’t been the nicest to Dirk, either. But Dirk hadn’t been there for most of it. 

Ironically, when Dirk had come to visit and had seen the state his little brother was in, it had been Dave who knew how to react when Bro had pulled a weapon on them both. There was some kind of self-fulfilling prophecy bullshit in there somewhere, he was sure. But other than a black eye that he could feel swelling as he sat there, they had got away pretty much unharmed. The thought was bizarre. ‘Got away’. They were leaving town for good. Off into the night, like two fugitives running from the law. Except instead of justice, they were running from their parental figure. 

“Where are we going, anyway?” he asked, pushing down the feeling that he couldn’t name deep down from his chest. Dirk shrugged. “I was thinking about getting pancakes.”  
“Pancakes?”  
“Yeah. I’m starving. I think there’s a diner a few miles ahead.”  
“Never had them.” Dave said absently. His stomach was growling. “Sounds good though.”  
“You’ve never had-?” Dirk cut himself off before finishing his sentence, turning red. He changed the subject quickly, “I figure we stop for breakfast foods and then we can head to my friend’s house. He told me we could crash for a few days if we need to, and he’s a nice dude.” 

Dave nodded. He’d heard a lot about Dirk’s friends. There was Roxy; they’d met at the gym when Dirk had asked about a sparring partner and she had pounced on him, all smiles and friendly punches. Jane was Roxy’s best friend and also helped Dirk learn to cook (which he was still useless at, but she’d tried), and Jake had volunteered to test out some of Dirk’s robotics programs and they’d been hanging out ever since. Dave knew them by name but not by face- he’d never met them, and his brother had never really been one for sentimental photos. 

He considered the three as Dirk pulled up into a grimy looking diner on the side of the highway. From the sounds of it, Jake would be letting them stay in his apartment while they figured out what to do next. It wasn’t huge, Dirk told him, and Jake’s younger sister Jade would be flitting around from time to time. But it would do for a little while. Through a mouthful of pancake, Dave mumbled, “I’m used to cramped living quarters- holy shit these are good. Fuck.”  
“Right?” Dirk replied, pouring more syrup onto the stack in front of him. “Jade is nice enough- a little eccentric, but then again so is Jake. In fact, he pretty much raised her from when she was really young, so they’re close.”  
“No folks around?” he asked. It was difficult to form sentences as he inhaled the food in front of him. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten something that wasn’t of the instant snack variety. Dirk shook his head. “No, I think they had a grandfather looking after them a long time ago but he died shortly after Jade was born. So it’s just been the two of them and their dog.”  
“You’re sure they don’t mind us crashing in the place? Sounds like a party.” He asked. Dirk nodded firmly. “Oh, no doubt. Jake wouldn’t turn someone in need away, even if it meant sleeping on the floor.” 

Something about the intensity of the response made Dave pause and stare carefully at his brother. Although the two of them made sure to keep their eyes covered, the eager lean forward and the hitch in tone made him smile. “Sounds like a good guy.” He said slyly. Dirk’s head tilted down toward his plate, and he replied shortly, “He is. We should get going soon. It’s already late.”  
He might as well have started crooning a ballad right at the grubby little table. 

Dave slipped in and out of sleep as they headed towards the city, lights blurring past in a dim orange glow. It had stopped raining, at least, and now the croaking purr of the engine lulled him into a sense of comfort. Dirk’s truck was old and battered, coughing occasionally when they had to tackle a steep hill, but the peace of the night settled into his bones and Dave felt better rested in those few short hours than he had in years. Finally, after driving in silence, Dirk cleared his throat and stifled a yawn. “Hey. We’re here.” 

The apartment complex was tall and thin, and crawling with ivy. A stark contrast to the grey cinderblock of his old home, Dave reached out a hand to trace the leaves hanging beside the door. Dirk slammed the door shut and moved past him, already on the phone. “Yeah, it’s me. Sorry we’re so late. What’s the number again?”  
Shortly after, the door buzzed and Dirk hung up. Dave dragged his bag behind him, too tired to lift it up to his shoulder. They climbed the stairs laboriously, until Dirk stopped him and knocked gently on the door beside him. A man answered the door in a dressing gown, yawning and running a hand through unkempt hair. It looked like he’d just woken up. He blinked and stared at the two of them before fixing a bright grin to his face. “Hello there, friends! Do come in!”

Dave started. Dirk had told him Jake was kind, and generous. He had told him stories of how funny he could be, and how his speech was more than a little unusual. 

What Dirk hadn’t told him, however, was that Jake was fucking adorable.


	2. A Normal Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave settles in to his new flat and meets his gracious hosts. Nothing goes wrong. No, really.

Thankfully, they were all too exhausted to stumble through basic pleasantries as they entered the hallway, so Dave was able to duck behind his brother and try to get his skin back to a normal temperature. Jake pulled Dirk into a hug and gestured to the door on their left. “I’m afraid I haven’t got a camp bed anymore- that was rather unfortunately lost on one of Jade’s camping trips- but there are blankets and sofa cushions for your pleasure!” he told them cheerfully. Dirk laid a hand on his shoulder and said firmly, “thanks, man. I owe you one.”  
“Aw, shucks, that’s nonsense, Dirk!” Jake replied before turning his warm gaze over to the man behind him. “You’re both welcome for as long as you need.”

Dave fixed his eyes on the carpet and nodded shortly. Jake wasn’t anything like he had imagined. He had pictured someone soft and small; the way Dirk had described him had made him sound somewhat homely. Instead, before him stood a young man only a little shorter than Dirk, and much broader. Although he wasn’t exactly muscular it was clear he kept fit, and Dave tried his best to pretend his gawking was just the vacant stare of the sleep-deprived. Jake offered them another wide smile and showed them to their room. 

Just as he had told them, it wasn’t much. Some couch cushions and blankets, with a small pile of mismatched pillows to choose from. Dave picked up two- they both had floral patterns embroidered into the cases. Dirk threw himself down onto the couch and grabbed a blanket with a flailing arm. “I called dibs.” He mumbled into the fabric, already half asleep. Dave settled down onto the floor beside him and smiled slightly. In the doorway, Jake turned to give him one last wave. “Sleep tight, old chum.” He said, flicking off the light. The room was plunged into darkness and Dave felt his face get warm- though he wasn’t sure if the embarrassment was his own or on behalf of his new host’s bizarre dialect. Dirk was already breathing slowly above him. The hallway light was left on and cast dull shadows across the walls. 

For the first time in forever, Dave slept through the whole night. 

Dirk had woken up by the time Dave roused from his slumber. The sofa was empty, only a crumpled blanket and some wrinkled pillows to show that there had once been an occupant. There was a thrill of panic through his stomach before he heard voices coming from somewhere outside the living room and he stretched widely before putting on his shades and heading to their source. 

There were three people in the kitchen- Dirk, who was sitting cross legged on the dining room table fiddling with something in his hands; Jake, his arms full of plates ready to place down; and a younger girl who looked about his own age. With the same dark skin and wide smile, Dave guessed it was Jake’s sister, Jade. They all paused when he entered the doorway and he folded his arms instinctively. “Don’t mind me,” he said in the coolest tone he could muster, “just wondering where the party was at.” 

“Morning sleeping beauty.” Dirk replied, not looking up. “Tried to wake you but you were out like a light. We thought you were dead for a while. I was going to wait for the dog to eat you.”   
Jake scowled. “Nonsense, Dave. I told everyone to let you sleep- I imagine you need it.” He elbowed Dirk playfully. “Don’t listen to a word.” 

Dave tried to smile, but the response made him freeze up. Why would he think he needed sleep? Unless Dirk had told him where they’d come from. Which he had specifically asked him not to do. Under any circumstances. 

Dirk seemed to feel his unease and finally met his gaze. “I can handle a night of long driving. Told Jake that you were a bit more delicate.” He said pointedly. He nodded almost imperceptively, and Dave’s eyes closed behind his shades. Of course he didn’t. He would never. He had panicked over nothing. 

He took a seat next to Jade, who stuck out one hand and waved with the other. “Hi! I’m Jade, it’s awesome to meet you!”   
She had a bright, enthusiastic voice that was instantly likeable. “Sup.” He replied. She cocked an eyebrow before laughing. “Oh, jeez. Another one.” 

Before he could sarcastically ask what that meant, Jake sat down opposite him with a large plate of toast. “Help yourselves!” he told them. The English/Harley family seemed to be good at breakfast. Jake served the food, while Jade hopped up and filled various jugs with juices of most descriptions. Dirk slid down from the kitchen table almost when instructed and they settled down to eat. Jade spoke the most, mumbling round mouthfuls of peanut butter and chocolate spread. “I need to feed Bec, still. He’ll be alright if I let him out now.” 

“Who’s Bec?” Dave asked, pouring another cup of coffee from the pot that had been brought over. Dirk answered for her. “It’s their dog. He’s super friendly, but only after you’ve met Jade. He really fucking loves her.”  
“You can meet him now if you’d like! Do you like dogs?” Jade asked, already swallowing her sandwich and leaping up. Dave nodded, fighting to keep down a smile. “Sure. I like dogs.”   
Jade beamed and disappeared. They could hear her talking from a few rooms down. “You’re going to meet Dave soon. He’s Dirk’s little brother. You know Dirk, and I know Dave. Be nice.” 

She returned shortly after. In front of her was a large white Alsatian, ears perked up to attention. Dave stared at the dog, and the dog stared back. There was silence for a moment, and Dave briefly wondered what would happen if the animal hated him. Would he have to leave? He couldn’t stay somewhere he’d offended the family pet. It was agonising, but after a glance at Jade behind him, Bec trotted over and wagged his tail, nudging his hand with a wet nose. Dave pat him, smiling a little. He caught Jake’s delighted expression in his peripheral and felt his face heat up again. Jesus, Strider. Chill out. Bec allowed himself to be fussed over for a few minutes before trotting back over to Jade, and then to his food bowl in the corner of the kitchen. 

“First step was a success, dude.” Dirk told him. “You’re part of the furniture, now.” 

The rest of the day was spent in similar domesticity, which would have probably been boring to anyone that hadn’t lived in the Strider household for twenty years. To Dave, it was bizarre and wonderful and straight up weird. Dirk showed them what he had been tinkering with at breakfast; he’d programmed the Roomba with facial recognition so it would follow around anyone not recognised and beep loudly. Jake seemed impressed, and Dave saw his brother glowing with the praise in the weird, stunted way a member of his family did. Dave pointed out that they’d have to reprogram it every time they had a visitor. Dirk shrugged. It’d make the holidays more interesting. 

Jade offered some wardrobe space while he was here, which he gratefully accepted. He didn’t like to admit it, but he was pretty proud of his wardrobe. Jade’s room was a mess, and definitely reflected the girl who owned it. There were explosions of colour everywhere, with soft toys and books and even a horrendously complicated looking bass guitar in the corner. She opened her wardrobe and shoved a bunch of her outfits to the side before presenting a modest gap for him to hang his stuff up. He did it methodically; making sure each section had a theme or order. Jade watched him in silence for a while, eyes wide. Placing a final shirt in the correct spot, he leant back on his heels. “Thanks.” He said shortly. Jade raised her eyebrows. She seemed to be doing that a lot. “No problem. I wouldn’t want Bec to sit on your stuff while you’re asleep! Now.” Her smile dropped for a moment and she looked deadly serious. “Tell me about yourself.” 

He paused. “Me?” he asked. She rolled her eyes.  
“Who else? Come on, if we’re going to be housemates you might as well give me something.”   
“Uh, well, I’m twenty. I like music?” he offered. She frowned at him. “Can’t I hear something juicier?”  
“I just left home?”   
Another frown.

“Fine,” he sighed dramatically, “You got me. Here goes.”   
Jade grinned eagerly and leant forward.   
“Hope you’re ready for this.”   
“I am!”   
“I… Am not a natural blonde.”   
She groaned and hit him playfully on the arm.   
“You ass! You really got me!” she threw herself down on the bed and huffed. “Fine. Keep your secrets. What kind of music do you like?”   
Dave fought the urge to look round at the bass. “I like all sorts. Electronic, mostly. I mix my own stuff sometimes.”  
“Really?” Her eyes went wide. “Can I hear some?”   
“I, uh, I guess?” he replied, taken aback. 

They spent most of the afternoon scrolling through his mp3 files. Jade seemed impressed, and even offered to let him record some bass lines if he wanted. By the time he left her room he felt relaxed, almost as though he’d known her forever. She was silly, but also smart and very talented. They left her room some hours later, and Dirk and Jake narrowed their eyes when they entered the lounge. “What have you two been up to?” Jake asked. Jade stuck her tongue out and winked. “Stuff I don’t want my brother knowing about.”   
Dave’s yawn turned into a choking cough. Dirk shot his brother a wicked grin, playing along. “Damn, bro. Getting in there quick.”   
Jake looked horrifically embarrassed. Dave stumbled over his words. “Uh, I, no…”

Finally, Jade let out a bark of laughter. “I’m kidding! Holy shit, your face!” She wrapped an arm around Dave and kissed him on the cheek. Jake laughed too, running a hand through his hair. Dave tried to wipe the sweat from his palms. “Yeah. Sorry, Harley. You aren’t exactly my type.” 

It was probably just his imagination, but he could have sworn Jake met his gaze for just a moment after speaking. 

“I’m just playing. Dave and I have been listening to his music- it’s really good!” She told them enthusiastically, ignoring their video game session and plonking herself directly between the two men. “You’re a musician, Dave?” Jake asked. Dave took some steps forward and perched himself on the arm of the sofa. “More of a DJ, sort of. I mix stuff.”   
“With my musical prowess and his mixing skills, we’re gonna take over the electronic scene.” Jade told them matter of factly. Jake nodded enthusiastically. 

The conversation quickly dissolved into a group debate on who was the most talented, ending in Jade challenging Dirk to a Smash tournament. Before they knew it, Jake and Dave had been forgotten in a wave of curse words and surprisingly vicious threats. 

“I was going to head to the shop before dinner to grab some stuff.” Jake said, standing up. The two beside him didn’t react. “Would you like to come with me, Dave? I could use an extra pair of hands.”  
Dave gulped. “Sure.” He said, as though he didn’t just feel his stomach lurch. A shopping trip with his handsome new housemate. Alone. With no buffer to make sure he didn’t make a total ass out of himself. 

Sounded perfect.


	3. shit lets go shopping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a certain Dave Strider finds himself alone in a car with his hot new housemate and has to deal with that concept for at least an hour

Jake’s car looked as well-loved as everything else in his household. Dents and scratches seemed like badges of honour, and Dave resisted the urge to kick the large front wheel to see how much mud he could dislodge from the grooves. Jake tapped his fingers together nervously as he watched the appraisal and laughed. “She’s a little unkempt, I’m afraid. Been on quite a few adventures lately!” he told him. Dave cocked an eyebrow, sliding into the passenger seat. 

“What do you do?” he asked. Small talk was what people did. He could do that.

Jake clicked his seatbelt into place and flashed a smile. “I actually work in the forest park as a guide! You know- the one up near the end of town?”   
Dave nodded. He actually had no idea where the park was, but the bright look in Jake’s eyes made it seem like it would almost be a crime to extinguish it. “It is rather marvellous. The only thing better than a good adventure is sharing it with others!”   
“Wouldn’t know.” Dave shook himself internally and leant back in feigned disinterest. “I don’t really do the outdoors.”

Jake’s expression didn’t falter. “I’ll have to prove you wrong!” He said. “I’ll take you out to the forest sometime on a hike!”   
Dave felt his throat tighten and once again thanked his shades for being such an efficient emotional shield. Jake, focused on the road, was difficult to read. He was absolutely not being flirted with by his brother’s best friend. At all. Surely, definitely not. And, even if he was, he really didn’t want to flirt back on their second day of meeting. First, technically. There had to be some other, logical, more overtly platonic meaning behind the offer. How the fuck was he even supposed to tell if the man kept being so fucking nice all the time? 

“I know Jade’s favourite spot to walk Bec, so we could go for a picnic sometime! It’s been ages since he’s been able to run properly.”

Dave’s chest released in a mix of relief and bitter disappointment. He had to be so damn right about everything. “Sure thing. Don’t know what Dirk is like in a picnic environment, so that should be interesting.”   
“Dirk has accompanied me on many a journey!” Jake told him, apparently oblivious to Dave slowly attempting to absorb himself into the leather seat.   
“Shit. Really? I always pictured him as constantly glued to his computer, or in some windowless lab building the Terminator.”   
“Oh, he was until I met him.” He replied cheerfully, taking a left and pulling in to an almost-empty car park. “I’m fairly sure he only left in order to visit the gym. I only met him because he advertised for someone to test out his projects, and here we are today! I managed to drag the sucker out of his hovel.” 

Dave tried to picture his brother lounging under a tree appreciating the wonders of nature and failed miserably. 

“Of course,” Jake added, holding the door open and allowing Dave to hop out, “I can’t take all the credit. Roxy was the one who started inviting us all to hang out together. I’m fairly sure she was sweet on him, but- ah- they’re just good friends.” He cleared his throat. “We all are. Good friends, I mean.” 

They both let the words hang in the air for a while, Dave fidgeting with a chain on his wrist. He didn’t want to unpack that. It was definitely not his business to work out that his brother had a crush on his heterosexual male friend and the said heterosexual male friend was standing in front of him with a basket in one hand and a crumpled shopping list in the other. Dave snorted. Who wrote things down anymore? Who needed lists when they went shopping? 

“I was thinking Italian tonight? Pasta, garlic bread, the whole shebang? I’m not much of a cook, but I do so want to treat my guests while they’re here.”   
Dave was grateful for the subject change, but didn’t think it was right to mention he’d never had pasta before. At least, not the kind of pasta Jake was probably talking about. Instant noodles did not count as pasta. So instead, he just nodded once. “Sounds good, my dude.”  
Jake put the list in his pocket. “You don’t talk much, do you Dave?” He asked. Dave shrugged, then cursed himself when Jake let out a laugh. “I mean- not really.” He formed the words carefully, as always. “Don’t want to give away all my genius too soon, yknow? Gotta keep the aura of mysticism.”  
Jake rolled his eyes. “You really are a Strider, eh?”

A flash of something in his mind cut the retort back from his lips.

“If the birth certificate is to be believed.” Dave replied, fixing his eyes onto the linoleum tiles. Although he knew the words had been innocent teasing, the knot in his stomach he hadn’t even known was there twisted sharply. Strider blood. Through and through. The sight of Jake’s wide grin suddenly made him feel sick. 

He shoved his hands into his pockets and nodded with a short, jerky movement before heading towards the pasta aisle. Settling into uniform, robotic movements, he let his cohort chatter mindlessly as they gathered the ingredients necessary for the dish. He really was a Strider. He was, wasn’t he? The chain on his wrist burned into his skin underneath his jacket. Once a Strider, always a Strider. Strider. He repeated to himself until it was impossible to tell if it was the word or the sound of his own heartbeat.

The sound of the car door slamming jolted him out of his trance.  
“Have I upset you, old chum?” Jake’s voice sounded shockingly loud next to him.   
“What?” Dave blinked rapidly, suddenly aware of the light streaming through the windshield. Jake’s torso was twisted towards him, the keys left hanging in the ignition. “You’ve been awfully quiet. Well- quieter than you were before. I was wondering if I’d upset you.”   
He looked so earnest that Dave felt his head shaking before he’d made the conscious decision to do so. “No, man. Don’t sweat it, a dude just needs his space sometimes.” He managed the excuse with relative smoothness. Jake frowned, almost to himself. “I know I shouldn’t have brought it up. Of course it would be a delicate subject for you, being related and all.” 

“I- what?” That definitely hadn’t been smooth- relatively or otherwise. “You know about that?”   
His heart was pounding. How much had he been told? Did he know why they had left? Of course he knew- he wouldn’t let two dudes just stay in his lounge for a vacation. Fuck, he didn’t want to do this now- 

“Well, of course I suspected Dirk would tell you about my rebuttal, since he’s your brother. It was foolish of me to bring it up. I am sorry, Dave.” 

The whiplash he was getting from all these emotions was starting to become physical. “You. Rejected Dirk.” He said slowly, giving himself time to breath. Jake had started the engine and was reversing back onto the road. “It’s nothing personal, obviously Dirk is a very dear friend. I just found it impossible to see him that way.” He explained, seeming genuinely pained. Dave let his face rest into careful neutrality. English wasn’t into dudes. That was good to know. That was a significantly easier blow to take than finding out he knew about his extensive history of childhood trauma. “You two still cool?” He asked.   
Jake nodded furiously. “Of course! Like I said, he’s a very dear friend. I wouldn’t want to lose him over something as trivial.” 

“That’s alright then.” Dave tried to push back the air of slightly bitter finality in the words. He was okay with two things; Dirk was in love with Jake, and Jake was straight. That did not mean he wanted to talk about those two things. He saw Jake’s mouth gape for a moment before he settled back onto the road in silence. 

Who said small talk was something people should do? That guy should get the opposite of an award. Like, an anti-award. They should be arrested for suggesting that people should attempt to talk to each other in confined spaces ever. 

The whole trip had only taken around an hour to complete, but Dave felt ready to crash as soon as they stepped through the front door. Too many things had happened that had caused too many emotions to come barrelling through his chest. It had exhausted him. Dirk and Jade were still in the lounge, although their feud had apparently been cast aside in favour of some kind of trashy TV show they were both equally passionate in shouting about. Jade waved at him as they stepped through the hallway, and Dirk offered a small nod. Dave nodded back. It was nice to feel wanted. They continued with the bags into the kitchen, which were dumped unceremoniously onto the dining table. 

Dave hovered at the doorway as he watched his host clatter around for some pans and other utensils. It was a kind of organised chaos; Jake seemed to generally know what he was doing, but the steps he took to get to his destination were stumbled and created more mess than Dave had ever seen in one kitchen. And that really was saying something. 

“Oh, confound it all!” Jake exclaimed as he threw yet another knife he wasn’t done using into the sink. “This doesn’t usually happen, I assure you. I’m all over the place tonight.”  
“Don’t sweat it,” Dave fought a smile off his face, “I’ll wash up. Think of it like rent money, but instead of cash I just spend three hours putting away your crockery.”   
Jake pouted. He hadn’t really thought that real people pouted, but here he was, Jake English, stirring a bubbling pot of tomato sauce and pouting right at him. The nerve of it. 

He had to remind himself that he’d only known this guy for a day and a bit. He’d only known this guy for a day and a bit, so he really needed to chill the fuck out and wipe the smirk off his face before someone noticed. 

“I’ll go and get Jade.” He said. 

The hallway lights were hopefully dim enough to hide the red in his cheeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in which dave is hopelessly gay and jake is hopelessly clueless


End file.
